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Posts: 133

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Q: Chinese couples still living with parents???

My boyfriend recently admitted to me his parents probably expected us to settle down and live with them in the future if we stay together...they're wealthy, they have a big house, but wtf! who lives with there parents anymore??

12 years 32 weeks ago in  Family & Kids - China

 
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Posts: 226

Shifu

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Although it's not as prevalent as it used to be, this definitely still exists. I had a friend in exactly the same situation as you. Her boyfriend's parents demanded that she leave her job to come and live with them (they lived on the outskirts).

Their son was either a tool or a wuss, because he also insisted that she follow him to live with his parents. She hated his parents and couldn't see herself living there. They broke up.

Even though the values of the family are slowly eroding, it's still immensely important in China. Good luck to you, sounds like you're gonna need it!

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12 years 32 weeks ago
 
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Governor

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Not all the Chinese couples living with their parents
The reasons to lives with their parents may be take care of their parents or finance depends on their parents

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12 years 28 weeks ago
 
Posts: 371

Shifu

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Most elderly Chinese expect to live with and be cared for by their son or daughter. This is quite normal and I cant believe you didn't see it coming. If you get married in China, you don't just marry one person but the whole family. Good luck being a slave for your inlaws for the next 40 or so years Tongue

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12 years 28 weeks ago

Tired of dirt and lies.

 
Posts: 37

Governor

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 In China, that is perfectly normal while you save money to buy a house. If they are really that rich they may buy you kids a house. I have seen that happen many times.

 If you get along with the parents and truly love him, it should not be a problem. I have had a Chinese wife for twenty years and am accustomed to the Chinese culture. I actually prefer it.

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11 years 23 weeks ago
 
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       Wow!!!    When one's is young live with parents it's sounds reasonable but.........

after marriage still living together?????? Plus bringing a partner?????

I don't belive westerns couples can admite this kind of life style. 

If yes, in rare/special case, I know........

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11 years 22 weeks ago
 
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This happens alot in China from what I've seen and understand. Being from a western culture I could never get use to it or fully accept it.  

 

I just recently learned that if you want to marry a Chinese girls a lot of parents will expect you to buy an apartment/home first..... it became a big discussion the other night with me and my gf because there's no way I could afford to buy a place, nor do I plan on staying in China forever so buying a place here makes little sense.  It's certainly an issue that will come up with her mother when/if we decide to get married and it will be interesting to see our cultural differences come out in full force.  I'm standing my ground on this one though, I'm not going to buy a place if it doesn't make sense just because an inlaw wants me to.

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11 years 22 weeks ago
 
Posts: 186

Governor

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It seems to be a recent phenomenon where children don't live with their parents past a certain age. You know, it might not be all that bad, but you need to know when to put your foot down. They'll go out of their way to help you, to serve your needs, etc.

 

Maybe I'm different but, despite being a westerner, I want to live with my parents for the rest of my life. When my parents are old, I want to make sure their twilight years are full of health and happiness, so I want to be there for them.

 

I really like the idea of one big family living together, sharing life and happiness, etc. I'm in the process of moving my wife's parents to America too. One big, giant, happy family.

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11 years 22 weeks ago
 
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https://www.scmp.com/business/companies/article/2159640/third-hong-kong-children-dont-know-what-their-parents-do-earn

 

I thought this was normal, none of my students know what there parents do most of the time I ask.

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5 years 31 weeks ago
 
Posts: 139

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If the couple worried about their parent, they can live nearby to their parent house.

They are not necessary to live with their parent. If their parent feel lonely at home, they can communicate through WeChat video call.

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5 years 30 weeks ago
 
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