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anonymous
Q: Chinese Guy...is he interested?
I'm a westerner and I like this Chinese guy. He started showing interest in me after a few weeks and we became friends. It started with eye contact and flirting and then we started having lunch together occasionally. Then two months ago he told me he has a promotion in another Asian country but still with our company.
We went out for dinner before I went back for christmas and he showed a lot of interest in me. The chemistry is undeniable. There is definitely something there.
When I came back after christmas he asked me about my future plans and how long I plan to stay in Asia.
We said goodbye last week and he said I am welcome to visit and to keep in touch.
He is a few years younger and hasn't quite made it in his career. This role in the other country will give him an opportunity to be promoted. I know he serious about his job, etc.
Because he is a local hire he gets very little holidays. I am pleased that he has invited me to stay. I will visit in a few months. From this information do you think he wants a relationship in the future. He is typically shy like most Asian men. I don't think this is "fun and games" to him.
Thanks
12 years 10 weeks ago in Relationships - China
You're right, of course he is going to be serious. But nothing he has said or done sounds like it says that he wants a relationship with you. Ok, maybe going to dinner alone with him a few times could mean something, but it could also be out of "friendliness." The flirting could just be "friendliness." Asking a lot of questions and being interested in you can just be "friendliness." Inviting you to visit is also out of friendliness. Haven't you ever have friends that say "You should come visit sometime." Maybe he wants you to visit, maybe he's just being polite.
Even if he does feel something for you, he hasn't said anything. It may be because it's not a good time for a relationship, or it could be that you're a foreigner or any number of things. He hasn't said anything about a relationship. Has he even hinted at it, saying something like "I need a good girlfriend"? Paying for dinner doesn't mean anything. Paying for other little things when you spend time together doesn't mean anything. These are just cultural things and are done out of politeness.
Believe me, all the normal signals can be there, and everything about it tells you he's interested, but the only way you'll know is if you ask. And don't feel bad if he says he's not interested in you. It can be heartbreaking, but sometimes it's better to ask and be disappointed, than to wait and wonder.
freak him already and see where it goes
to be honest this sounds more like someone pretending to be a "westerner"
derek:
Crimo. I agree. That's my thought too......it was my initial reaction as I read this.
Jnusb416:
I don't think it's fake, but this person keeps asking "Does he like me?" kind of questions.
kchur:
"He is typically shy like most Asian men" Yeah She posted it before because I clearly remember being like , "Chinese dude shy? wtf?" That's like saying, I don't know, that water, like most liquids, is very dry.
kchur:
Not to me they aren't. I have more male Chinese strangers approach me in a month hen I've had non-Chinese approach me in my life. And they're extremely familiar, too, talking to me about the most intimate details of their life, even though I try to make it clear I'm not interested, and we don't even know each others' names.
crimochina:
this story is being sold to us and not told to us too much unimportant details. it rings of what a chinese person would think o a western woman. how old is she 16?
crimochina:
exactly kchur they think we think all asian guys are shy. why use asian and not chiese talk about trying too hard
