The place to ask China-related questions!
Beijing Shanghai Guangzhou Shenzhen Chengdu Xi'an Hangzhou Qingdao Dalian Suzhou Nanjing More Cities>>

Categories

Close
Welcome to eChinacities Answers! Please or register if you wish to join conversations or ask questions relating to life in China. For help, click here.
X

Verify email

Your verification code has been sent to:

Didn`t receive your code? Resend code

By continuing you agree to eChinacities's Privacy Policy .

Sign up with Google Sign up with Facebook
Sign up with Email Already have an account? .
Posts: 7204

Emperor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

Q: What is the protocol at a Chinese funeral?

Sooner or later I will have to attend one

and unfortunately it might come around very soon

What are the do's and don'ts for this?

If I ask the wife I will still be waiting for a answer into the next life time

Im guessing Black is out and white is in for starters

 

11 years 18 weeks ago in  Culture - China

 
Answers (11)
Comments (3)
Posts: 1968

Emperor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0
  1. Mourning
    • It is customary for the Chinese to practice a period of mourning for 100 days after the funeral of an adult male. According to the China Culture website--a piece of colored cloth is worn visibly on the sleeve of every family member. The children of the dead wear black, grandchildren wear blue, and if there are any great-grandchildren, they wear green.

    Significance

    • Each family member holds a different level of importance. Elders are given the highest amount of respect whereas children are given almost no respect at all. When an elder dies, he is given the proper funeral rites practiced in the Chinese culture, which includes a gathering of the family, covering up mirrors so that no bad luck--such as another death--occurs, and a viewing of the body.

       

      The Chinese believe that an elder should always be respected, and that elders do not have to show any respect to children. Therefore, if a child dies, their death and burial occurs in silence, and the funeral rites received by an elder are not received by a child.

    Beliefs

    • According to the Encyclopedia of Death and Dying, if a Chinese person dies, it is customary for women to prepare the body instead of the men because they believe in the risk of pollution. This means that the woman is sacrificing her health in place of a man's health.

       

      If for any reason a person meets an unexpected and bad ending--such as an accident--the family of the deceased refuses to touch the body. This is especially the case if a suicide occurs because it is believed that touching the body will bring the family bad luck.

       

    Customs

    • The grieving etiquette of the Chinese differs from many other cultures. Although the Chinese do follow much of the same traditions as Western burials, there are still significant differences. Cremation is not commonly practiced. During the funeral and grieving process, the family will burn certain goods so that the smoke of the burned items carries these goods up to their loved ones for use in the afterlife.

    Tip

    • If you are extended an invitation to a funeral that will be practiced by another culture, such as the Chinese, it is best to learn the funeral and grieving etiquette that follows before attending. Even the smallest misunderstanding can prove to be disrespectful toward the family of the deceased.

 

At the Funeral

  Instructions

    • 1

      Write a note expressing your sadness for the loss of the deceased. If you knew the deceased well, it is appropriate to write about a special memory. You could include a verse or poem, either composed by you or copied from another source, along with your note.

    •  
    • 2

      Wear conservative clothing to the viewing or funeral. Black or dark colors are not required but are acceptable. The family usually wears white, which is the color associated with sadness. Wearing red to a Chinese funeral is considered extremely poor taste because red is associated with happiness and prosperity.

    • 3

      Remove your shoes before entering if the funeral is in a temple. Doing so is a sign of respect for the building, the deceased and his or her family.

    •  
    • 4

      Bow when you approach the family and/or view the body. Nothing needs to be said. You do not need to shake hands. The simple bow willl convey your condolences very well.

    •  
    • 5

      Place poems, calligraphy or a gift of money in or near the casket. This honors the deceased. If you give money, never give an even amount. For example, instead of leaving $10 or $52, leave $11 or $53. Odd amounts cannot be divided equally between two people. One person will always have more than the other. The symbolism behind leaving an odd amount of money is that you are wishing the best for the deceased and the family.

    •  
    • 6

      Send white or yellow flowers. Gifts of flowers are common at Chinese funerals in the same way that people give food or flowers in a Western funeral. Make sure the florist understands not to use any red flowers, a red vase or any red decorations in the arrangement.

    •  
    • 7

      Open the white envelope that the family may have distributed. Some families give a small piece of candy in a white envelope to each person at the funeral. This is to remind people that life has its sweetness among the bitterness. When you remove the candy, immediately discard the white envelope, which represents sadness.

 

philbravery:

Thanks mate

that is some great information to take on board

11 years 18 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
11 years 18 weeks ago
 
Posts: 887

Shifu

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

There was one outside my window last weekend...

The noisiest thing i have ever experienced i think...

orchestra and marching, Min nan opera, Chinese 'techno' with girls dancing on a stage...at one point all of that at the same time...

Report Abuse
11 years 18 weeks ago
 
Posts: 9631

Emperor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

981977405 great information.

 

It is worth checking up on any local differences, or family traditions. As long as you are dressed appropriately most things will be straightforward. Despite lots of things being different, the concept is the same as that of a western funeral, to pay the last respect and say goodbye. 

Report Abuse
11 years 18 weeks ago
 
Posts: 33

Governor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

What a great explanation by 981977405. I never knew there was so much significance to a Chines funeral. How did you learn all that?  Are you Chinese and if not what book did you read. I'd love to get my hands on a book that explains stuff like this.

Report Abuse
11 years 18 weeks ago
 
Posts: 981

Shifu

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

Some good advice above for funerals.  But it depends if they're buddhists or not - in buddhist funerals I've seen people dressed in white, dancing around in a circle and banging drums.  And I am seriously not sh*tting you.

Report Abuse
10 years 36 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2494

Emperor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

Do act yourself....Don't act foolish....Do comfort the famlly members or try to....Don't start any fights while you're there....Do pay respects to the deceased by putting a flower next to the casket....Don't stare.....Do let the elders speak or do what they have to first....Don't speak over the elders...

 

Report Abuse
10 years 35 weeks ago

There are cookies, bookies and too many rookies for me to sit here trying to be a hooky! Looky Looky don't call me a wooky. Touchy Touchy Feely Feely Spicy Spicy Nicey Nicey & that's what the doctor Ordered!!

 
Posts: 9192

Emperor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

Looking for a new wife? I'd look for Sparkey and send her off too. Why waste a good funeral?

Report Abuse
10 years 35 weeks ago
 
Posts: 1391

Emperor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

Something that I'm not sure has been mentioned but my ex told me:

The family of the deceased is not supposed to go to sleep until the funeral.

 

Maybe I misunderstood her, but that's what I was told. (Maybe someone can confirm this?)

Report Abuse
10 years 35 weeks ago
 
Posts: 7204

Emperor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

Well it finally happened , My poor wife lost her mum last week . I got her on a plane within hours but I couldn't go with her even if I wanted too. My Brother in-law stayed with their Mum at the Morgue till the funeral and till the sisters could get their to have their turn watching over her , My Brother in-law did not sleep for 3 days  . They told their Dad the day before the funeral . I have No idea when she is coming home but I hope it is soon

sorrel:

I am so sorry to hear that. It sucks that you can't be there with your wife as this is a big loss for her.

10 years 25 weeks ago
Report Abuse

Scandinavian:

I'm sorry for your loss. Sad you cannot be there for your wife, you must try to offer the support you can via Skype or the likes, and be ready with a big hug when she returns. 

10 years 25 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
10 years 25 weeks ago
 
Posts: 79

Governor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

do not smile to anyone at anytime.  do nothing but showing them you are too in sorrow.

Report Abuse
10 years 22 weeks ago
 
Posts: 5732

Emperor

0
0
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
0

https://www.scmp.com/video/china/2157674/coffins-seized-and-smashed-china-under-zero-burial-policy

 

I wonder if they will take away Confucious and Mao's coffins in the crackdown. We have to fair about this.

Report Abuse
5 years 22 weeks ago
 
Know the answer ?
Please or register to post answer.

Report Abuse

Security Code: * Enter the text diplayed in the box below
Image CAPTCHA
Enter the characters shown in the image.
  • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd> <img> <br> <p> <u>
  • Web page addresses and e-mail addresses turn into links automatically.
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.
  • Textual smileys will be replaced with graphical ones.

More information about formatting options

Forward Question

Answer of the DayMORE >>
A:  "... through ..."?  Only "through" comes to mind is "S
A: "... through ..."?  Only "through" comes to mind is "Shenzhen agent can connect you with an employer, who's authorized to hire waigouren ... and can sponsor Z visa." It's not like every 10th person you meet in Shenzhen's hood can sponsor work visa ...  The only way to change from student to labourer visa is just a regular way by: 1. Finding an employer, who'll apply for an Invitation letter; 2. Exit China and apply for Z visa in your home country's Chinese embassy; 3. Enter China in 30-days after Z visa was stamped into your travelling instrument ...As I am aware, you won't be able to switch to Working permit by remaining in China....,so make ready for a return to your home .... -- icnif77