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Q: Chinese people and self-expression
People often say Chinese people (and maybe Asians in general) are bad at self-expression, and I kind of felt that way too for a long time although I coudn't really put my finger on it, then today I was listening to a Chinese friend who said they weren't having a good day （"心情不好"）and I asked them why and they took forever to respond and were being really vague, and I kept saying it's okay you can tell me we're friends, and I suddenly realized it's not because they had the words but were afraid to say anything, it's because he didn't even have it formulated in his head yet! He just knew he felt bad but didn't bother to put it into words yet, and I think it's because Chinese people (or again, probably Asians in general) just aren't brought up to tell other people about their problems the way Westerners are encouraged to "let it all out", so they don't even bother verbalizing it. Am I right? Is that not exactly it???
11 years 37 weeks ago in Relationships - China
I can't say it's a generality, but so far the people I've met were the kind who "let it all out" with me. I never really felt like keeping one's emotion for one's self was that common among young people.
When it comes to older people though, they do seem a bit more... "reserved"
(I haven't spoken English for a while, it shows)
That's a good possibility, to test it you would need to speak to someone who was born in China but has lived in a 'western' (sorry to the antipodeans for using that term but if you have a workable alternative I'm all ears) nation for a while and see if they 'vent'.
Now, my wife fits that bill she is Chinese, we lived in UK for 6 years (together) but while she can let rip quite well, just having a 'bad ..... day' isn't yet known, when she's in a mood I've learned to play mellow and duck. Now is that me adapting to her or evidence of your theory, I honestly, don't know.
Not exactly what you're asking but kind of in the same ball-park so i'll continue all the same, but i've had one realization while being here which is that this image westerners have of Chinese being unexpressive, though true on one level in that they haven't been encouraged (by themselves) to hone their artistic creativity and express themselves honestly, there also seems to exist a parallel, contradictory truth, in that you could be sitting in a net-bar and have the guy next to you burst into song, without any awareness or self-consciousness and just sing away for the joy of it, whereas in much of the western world, I can say with confidence, that you would almost never see that happen, and if it did happen, said person would most likely be considered a mental case. It's a strange contradiction.
Red thumb, down thumb, pigtails, nur.
Yawn.
