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Sign up with Google Sign up with FacebookQ: Has the behavior of a few salacious laowais impacted your relationships with Chinese?
I remember when I first started dating my girlfriend, she has lots of reservations and anxieties about fidelity. Specifically about me remaining faithful. It's been a couple of years now so I've proven her wrong, but I've found that in many of my interactions with Chinese (relationship, workplace, etc.), the behavior of a few laowais in China had a huge impact on what people expected of me.
Has this been the case with others? Did you have to 'work' to prove to them you weren't a CriminoChina?
12 years 44 weeks ago in Relationships - China
Strange question coming from a man with Salacious in his name. But yes, we all have to bare that cross, I believe. But I think even Chinese girls think the same way about Chinese boys.
But the main reason is that Chinese girls, especially the ones that can speak English to a good degree, know just how easy it is for foreigners to get laid here. They know that foreign men are considered prime targets by a lot of girls who will do anything to get one.
Plus there are the tons of guys who come here on short contracts with the sole intention of having sex with every girl they can wrap their arms around. So because of them and other reasons we are subject to mistrust by the locals.
SalaciousC:
If you've seen Star Wars, you know my name has less to do with my character than it does with the picture of Salacious Crumb.
It definitely does....Many foreigners hate each other for their bad behaviors in China....
Traveler:
I really hate doing this, but I have to agree with Localla. I actually do dislike the foreigners that give us a bad name (hate is a little strong, though).
I would say must actions in general by foreigners in China will impact the opinion of foreigners held by Chinese. As an example, I was once on atrain ride on a soft sleeper, and an older lady just plain refused to use her berth because I was sharing the compartment. She demanded I move elsewhere, and my reply was she had the problem, either sleep at her berth or she would move. She ended up moving herself, but later told a third that I seemed a nice cool fellow, but she was terrified of laowais because the daughter of a good friend married one and she got beaten by him a few times.
This is the reason why I do make a point of replying to all "Hello's" I get on the street, and also do it with a smile on my face. Being polite is by no means being weak. To me is more that I do feel in a way as an Embassador that a private individual.
No, more like the other way around. I notice when I meet Chinese people I am automatically alert for certain things and only view them differently when they do something that distinguishes themselves.
It's the intelligent girls that are the relationship material, the girls you want, but then it's the intelligent girls who know the reality!
funny you mentioned my name. every job i had i did what was asked of me without complaints , my students love me to death and one of my students almost got into a fight with a cleaning lady because the lady said something rude to me. when i taught a summer camp my students were the only class to arrange a big surprise for their teacher.
every relationship i've been in i've been faithful, but hey if the relationship isnt going anywhere why keep it going? i dont lie about what i'm searching for. if being an adult and making adult decisions means i'm a bad guy then hell i'll be a bad guy with a nice life. that's why people like you rummage through this site looking for my posts to thumbs down them as if it means anything. but to me you and whoever else dont even matter.
I met many Chinese (women and men) and whatever questions they have about myself or about foreigners in general, I always try to be straight and honest with my answers. If somebody asks me a question about China or Chinese just to hear a good comment, I just cut short the questions and ask directly what answer they expect from me : good only or also bad.
The same when people ask questions about my country or my countrymen, I mentioned the good parts, but also the shitty parts.
But, I also emphasized that foreigners like Chinese are all different, some have good manners, some bad ones.
Whatever one foreigner may do, does not reflect all foreigners, as well as what one Chinese does, doesn't reflect all Chinese.
So, no. I didn't see any impact from what some foreigners may wrongly do and my relationship with the Chinese people I know.