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Sign up with Google Sign up with FacebookQ: how to maintain good marriage?
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There is a saying “marriage is the tomb of love”. but how to maintain good and harmonious marriage WITH love?
13 years 5 weeks ago in Relationships - China
The key is to give it each other breathing room. In other words, allowing the other to have the space they need to be themselves. This can be tough sometimes, especially if one of the spouses finds together-time very important and is clingy. And it also requires trust.
But if you do everything together day in and day out, as the years go by , you're going to take each other for granted and get so used to each other that there's no excitement. You may even end up despising the other. This is when conversations run dry after about a minute, and most of what you say has to do with practical things like "who's picking up the kids today."
Before it gets to that stage, you have to mutually encourage each other to have your own things going on. If you're an multi-cultural couple, it's fine if you decide to go back home to your country for a month without your spouse or vice-versa. But just make sure you communicate well.
And if all that fails, there's always marriage counselling. (see link)
Go out on dates regularly. Switch things up. Don't settle into the same old routine all the time. Don't turn arguments into a winner/loser kind of thing. Have sex often. Be affectionate.
Mutual respect.
There is another saying, "if there is no marriage, love will die in the wild."
Best rule to live by.... all arguments must be done in the complete nude.
The time it takes for both partners to strip will give time for tempers to cool and heads to level a bit. And hey, the love of your eye is naked in front of you... really encourages you to work out the problem as soon as possible
marriage therapists often talk about the "storehouse of good will". So long as you can keep that up you are golden. But once that's gone, all you have in steadily building resentment. Keep that in mind and try to not to sweat the small stuff and you will be golden.