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Sign up with Google Sign up with FacebookQ: How to maintain relationship with friends back home?
I email and skype my friends all the time but still feel the distance growing year after year. Is it possible to still stay close when you're so far away for many years? Anyone have any advice on this subject?
12 years 23 weeks ago in Relationships - China
Depending on how close you were to your friend I've found it difficult, but I wasn't really that close to my friends. So what you feel may be different from the next person. I figure you could have been really close to your friend if you feel so distant to them now. Have them come visit you occasionally or you go visit them. I knew some friends in Texas that's what they did to keep close. Even if its for 2 or 3 weeks it will still be worth it if you miss your friend that much.
That's one of the sad truths about starting a new chapter in your life. You'll have a couple of close friends that you can jump right back into the swing of things no matter how long it's been. But for most, you're going to lose them. It will become just a birthday/christmas wish and open promises that "we need to get together and catch up."
Friends back home will want to hear the basic stories from China. But they won't appreciate half of what you want to tell since they've never experienced anything even remotely similar. And they will grow tired of tales of your daily life (kinda of down look on people, but if it's not interesting or something they are involved in, they loose interest).
Then again maybe I'm just bitter because no matter which side of the world I'm on, I find myself in a long distance long term relationship and none have worked out yet.
Friends change and come and go with distance and with age.
Long-distance friendship can survive and modern-day technology surely makes it easier but friendship, after all, is about physical presence, and when that physical presence is absence, the friendship may continue to exist, but still in a slightly reduced form.
Enjoy the adventure of being away from all these people; reunion will be much more appreciated the less tales you tell before you get back. Or not, depends on how much you need to keep in touch with friends. It's entirely subjective.
The best way is through Facebook. that way, your always in the know about whats happening in their lives and vica versa..
1. Start a blog so they can always keep up with your adventures. I use Wordpress but you'll need a proxy for that.
2.Send weekly emails.
3. Stay connected on skype.
Don't get upset if your friends back home don't contact you often. I've been here 3 months this time and have only heard from my best friend of 12 years three times. People are busy with their own lives so don't let it get you down. Try to make new friends where you are.
Life goes on, and if you are not seeing someone on a daily basis, it is hard to relate to their situation. You might as well get used to the fact that people change, and while you are in China, you will change. Remember, you are the one in a new place, not them, so they are dealing with the status quo, and might not find a lot to say when you write them. It becomes a case of "same ol' same ol'" in their lives. And when it comes right down to it, they are not going to be that interested in you experiences. They will be polite, at first, but after a while, their eyes will glaze over and they will want to move on to other things.
I have a few friends that I haven't seen in years, and when we get together, we pick up right where we left off, because our friendship is long standing and our interests are common enough that we can do so.
Some ways to keep in touch are Skype, blogging, email, and of course, Facebook. You may want to start a Flickr or photobucket account to post photos. Tumblr is a good way to combine both, and then include your account IP at the bottom of your emails.
All in all, it will take more effort on your part than on theirs to stay connected.