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Q: What is your opinion on typical Chinese "concerns"?
As the biggest Chinese Festival comes, people in China will have a big get together with the family. We visit friends and relatives, have big family gathering. This may looks happy, but the unavoidable "concerns" from the relatives and friends especially from the elder really annoyed us. Do you have a GF/BF? When will you get married? What's your salary? Then a various comparison with someone else... ... These questions are asked by almost everyone we meet during the festival. Some even dare not to go home for fear of these "concerns". You may consider these as privacy, but do you bother these questions by your closest friends or family?
I feel really sorry for all of the pressures put on young Chinese. And it sucks that all of this pressure is magnified when you go home during what is supposed to be a "celebratory" time of year.
As a foreigner here, I feel very relieved that I don't have to personally deal with most of these concerns to the same extent as locals do. (If/when I marry a Chinese girl, that's another story).
Best of luck back home Eric!
Eric-Lee:
Thanks for your answer. This isn't a question of myself, but millions of young Chinese people. Though I am bothered with the "concerns", I still look forward to going home. What's more, I have to cherish the train ticket that I kept on clicking for a whole day. Hope you have a nice time during the Spring Festival.
It's not just a Chinese thing, Eric... it happens all over the world. It's called 'caring'.
However, that being said, I do think that the pressures put upon Chinese to get married and have kids earlier in life is a lot stronger. Add to this the way the economy is going, and the competition for good jobs, I can see their concerns being a little justified.
But, it certainly doesn't help if you haven't lived up to their expectations, or you're not in a good position to give them the sort of answers they want...
As for me... I have as little to do with my family as possible 
Scandinavian:
The great philosopher Sting said "If you love someone, set them free"
The Chinese are obsessed with controlling their close family. I know a girls whose mother is VERY concerned about her daughter finding a good man and having a baby. So the poor girl is going through one long line of fix-ups with sons of her old co-workers.
Maybe, she just isn't ready for a relationship, maybe all the boys that are found for her are just not what she is looking for. Wouldn't you think that relaxing this concern and just letting the girl take things at her own pace would be better.
Eric-Lee:
The "caring" may happen all over the world, but they are mostly from the closest friends or family. While in China, we have to face the "caring" from almost everyone we meet during the Festival. Our parents, parents' friends, all kinds of relatives, neighborhoods...... We do not even know some of them!
the list of questions people have to endure from their families is almost endless.
Do the parents/family ever simply ask "are you happy?"
I'll bet the parents of young people are half interested in their kids well being, and half interested in them getting a big salary so they can be guilted into buying lots of shit for their parents.
(oh by the way, is having a bad China day)
Shining_brow:
Happiness is not required... only stability, and children.
In a way, it makes sense. The way kids get pampered here (compared to many other countries), the parents really would feel like they are 'owed' something in return. And, when this generation gets old, and they have grandkids, they too will feel that their children ought to look after them... it's the way it is!
The problem that I see, is many here don't understand that you can actually have both - happiness and financial security/stability.
Most of us on this board come from an upbringing that hasn't included starvation and desperation... our parents (or grandparents) didn't either. However, China did - and in living memory. Also, most of us who come from overseas are used to our mod-cons... we've had them for decades. China is just catching up on them, and the parents are just responding to this. Give it a generation, and such 'concerns' won't be voiced so much :p
