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Sign up with Google Sign up with FacebookQ: I've hit the wall. Has anyone got the answer?
I can go on, but I don't want to. It's braindead. So, what's the answer?
Suggestions welcomed.
Take it easy.
When you hit the wall you understand why so many locals want to leave.
We have our passports, we can go back to civilization whenever we want to, it's a bit more complicated for those who are married, but there is always a way.
99.99% of the Chinese are stuck here with no hope to ever get out, especially now since most Western countries don't welcome wealthy Chinese anymore.
Go to Thailand (or the Philippines) for a week or two, lie on a beach with a cocktail and get as much sunlight as possible, enjoy the local food for a bit of change from oil and bones, have a chat with the friendly people there to retrieve your faith in mankind, it will do you more than well.
I hit the wall about a year ago.Same thing as you, I can go on but the will to do it just isn't there anymore. I want to leave.
Planning my exit helps me get by the day to day bullshit and gives me something to look forward to.
It all seems less braindead and more like a temporary holiday when I know I'm going to leave.
Strawberry66:
I have hit the wall recently
I am bored in Shanghai,I want to get out of China for a new weeks holiday without job bothering me. I just want to stay away from China for a while. I want to spend my holiday in a place where food is not Chinese,lanugage is not Chinese,people do not look Chinese,safe,blue skype,blue water,people do not shit in the street. Ah...When my dream can come true as most of my holidays are too short to go for holiday outside of China? Sign.
A one way ticket back home. Your only issue is getting your wife along for the ride.
If that's not possible, just get out of China for a couple of weeks, a few days of Thai food, a pool/beach and some sun will do you the world of good.
royceH:
Wife has temporary residency and permanent residency will happen before the end of the year.
So, we could go now. But we won't. Maybe by the end of next year. Or the one after that.......
Well, if you are single,love the beach/water, and will have some time to spare: there are free Dive Master (scuba diving) certification internships in Thailand.
There are full on No Dive->instructor courses, but they cost between 8-10,000$ and last 7 months.
The charged no dive->Dive Master courses run about 2 months long, and cost about 4000$.
This is my tentative plan for summer, 2016
Shining_brow:
Your first lot of prices are very expensive - and the times very long!
Which area were you looking at?
Spiderboenz:
Koh Tao, Thailand.
The cost seems high because it is the full cost, including gear and housing. It seems long because it is going from non-diver to Dive Master (multiple certifications)
Open Water (the first level) is only 4 days long, and costs just a few hundred dollars.
Look into the eyes of your kids to remember why it's all worth it.
If no kids, time to have kids!
Your life will be turned upside down, but you'll be too preoccupied to worry about walls.
Is there any writing on the wall next to you? Can you make out any of what it says? Or is that why you're asking for a third perspective? I'd like to help ya out but I think we're all living on that wall one way or another.
When you hit the wall you understand why so many locals want to leave.
We have our passports, we can go back to civilization whenever we want to, it's a bit more complicated for those who are married, but there is always a way.
99.99% of the Chinese are stuck here with no hope to ever get out, especially now since most Western countries don't welcome wealthy Chinese anymore.
Go to Thailand (or the Philippines) for a week or two, lie on a beach with a cocktail and get as much sunlight as possible, enjoy the local food for a bit of change from oil and bones, have a chat with the friendly people there to retrieve your faith in mankind, it will do you more than well.
Here are some suggestions:
- Try a fitness or martial arts camp in China, Thailand or the Philippines for a month or so
- Try a diving course (as mentioned above) for a few months
- Try a camping expedition (they offer these in Mongolia)
- Try starting up a small business (small goals always help people out of a slump)
- Take up a new hobby like cooking, painting, learning Tai Chi or something relaxing
---
The first three will give you time to recharge your batteries while doing something meaningful. Camps in China cost about $400 - 1000 USD, Thailand and Philippines a bit more... the Expedition is like $1 - 2k USD.
Of course accommodation, food and all that is provided. I am going to do a fitness camp later this month, if you are up for it... I can give you details.
Try kindies students. They always put me in the good mood.
Move out of Xin.?? Try elsewhere in China, where beer is not so warm.
On more 'serious' note: 'I think, drinking warm beer is 'health (mood) hazard' for any Ozz-man'. Backpack with portable fridge comes to mind. LOL
royceH:
Try kindy students? Hohohohoho........NO.
Move from Xinjiang, good idea. If I was unencumbered I'd move to Yunnan. But I'm not, so I can't. I'll stay where I am until we pack up and blow this town....and head for Australia. Or the Philippines if I can talk her into it..... But not much chance of that.
I assume "hit the wall" means you are not in good spirits... not enjoying your life, and not sure how to turn it around.
I thing the gym suggestion is one of the best... get out and do something, some exercises.
whatever it may be, when down and out, just go expend some energy at some other place.
signing up to courses or physical fitness stuff has never been something I do... they, the exercises can be done at home... ... a bit of a social thing you can get at a gym.
mind off the troubles is a key. mind on your well being. this place is fine if you let it be fine.
whatever.. eat more ice cream... drink more tea.. exercise... turn off the tv and the computer... couple hours a day. and the best ever way to drown your sorrows is of course, have a few nice cool, cold, delicious beer ..... after the workout of course.
my thoughts are... if you can't get yourself to do it at home...at least get a start on it.... why pay somebody to tell you to do it, when you do not even listen to yourself.
Spiderboenz:
Alcohol (beer) is a depressant. So consuming one, or several, is an extremely bad idea for someone who is not enjoying things. It is counter-productive.
dongbeiren:
I completely agree about the gym - regular exercise is the most natural high. It is a great way to get your spirits up. It keeps me sane and focused in China.
royceH:
It's not that I'm not in good spirits. I am. Just that I've had a gutfull of teaching to a group of people who aren't interested. And I don't blame them at all.
So I need to come up with another plan. Probably gotta stay here for another year or two.
Tomorrow's my big day, 7 classes, and I've decided to tell them how to cook something using an oven. They won't understand a thing, and if a few do, they absolutely won't care, but I'll enjoy it.
gouxiong:
Oh, royceH, you sound like a cool guy!
So you decided to waste money, time and effort of your students in exchange for your 'enjoyment'?
So this is what 'superior' Western professional approach mean?
Many of these people are certainly living on much lower package than you but you still decide to prioritize your mood over your job duties?
Well, with teachers like that who could wonder so few Chinese can speak English ...
I just hope you are not meaning it seriously ...
royceH:
You show me a Chinese student who puts in any effort and I'll show you a clip of me winning the Melb Cup atop Rooting King.
BHGAL:
not sure how to show you ...... but I know 2 very good hard working students.... one is my step daughter (25) that has learned not to expect to get rich because her MOM married a white guy and the other is a nephew (19) that works his ass off most every day to try to get into a decent Hong Kong University and still finds the time to enjoy a basketball or badminton game with his small town mainland friends.
these are not little children and they were not trained or brought up by me with western ideals....... they have been educated and "driven" by the family that I have joined ......they have no money... no guanxi , and a fantastic attitude that comes from an amazing family..............
I also hit the wall a few months back. Now I'm planning our sailing expedition to our next home (Belize) to keep me sane. So, while my wife is working on getting an American passport, I have sailing lessons, boat research and tons of planning for the move. If it weren't for these distractions, I would be perpetually angry. So by all means, keep yourself occupied until you can extricate yourself from this country.
Actually, robk's suggestion of study and gaining new interests is a great one and if you're doing it for purely personal interest and have decent quality inernet it doesn't have to cost. I've followed a few MOOC courses in subjects that interest me but that I don't have the aptitude/desire to turn into a career and they're often fantastic. Using your brain a little more than the standard China teaching day allows for might make a difference.
royceH:
Very good idea. Thanks. I had a look at this MOOC thing a year or two ago and I remember I didn't really find anything that turned me on. I know it has developed quite a bit since then so I'll see what I can find. Ta.
If you are on wechat, add some of the members here.
It's like having a pocketful of little foreign friends on tap to rant with
Look on it as a time to step back and re-evaluate the direction you want to go in.
As MissA pointed out, MOOC's are a good place to spark an idea: maybe throw up some fresh ideas.
Maybe a change of location is needed (as you have mentioned), maybe a former hobby or interest can be revived, maybe a new one tried.
Maybe set yourself a goal (a 3 to 5 year plan) that encompasses all your experiences and interests.
Everyone reaches the 'stuck in a rut' phase at some point, so at least recognising it is a place you don't want to be is a step forward.
It's amazing how much teaching sucks the energy out of you, especially when dealing with zombie classes, so you have to find a way to get it back for yourself. Good luck !
royceH:
As ever, sorrel...steady as a rock. Thanks for your suggestions, all of them are sound.
I'll see. That's what I usually do.
I hope things go well for you.
Staring at two more years in China,Jesus.....i'm like you, I can't stand this place. I will finally get outta dodge this summer, really looking forward to that. China has some ok things about it, but all the noise,pollution,trash everywhere, grinding shoulder to shoulder everyday with these people is wearing me down. Sometimes I look around and try to imagine what this place looked like before they humped themselves out of peace and quiet. I look forward to peace and quiet again, that's how I get by.
Buy a small bbq off taobao. Get yourself some lamb chops, and do a fry-up! (if you can't get a bbq, go bush, and just do it over an open fire)
You like cooking? Make a Pavlova!
Meditate. with the focus being on the present (ie, not griping about the past, nor dreading/fantasising about the future - just be in this instant, in this second, here and now. Stay there - in each second - for a while).
BHGAL:
this is a good comment ... meditation is good, a daily thing to stay "grounded"?
I screw up my routine a bit much, but I sure do like going to the local quiet park and just sitting and blanking the brain.